My life is very hectic. I live with my amazing boyfriend in New York State. It’s not only expensive to live here but its also very fast-paced. It’s almost like someone hit fast forward x16 and it only effected this state. I’m finding that I spend my days rushing to work, rushing through work, and rushing back home. There is little time for sleep and little time for healthy food decisions. I work at a hotel full time + overtime from 3pm-11pm, anywhere from 5-7 days a week. And 9 times out of ten I’m working 7 days a week. These next two weeks, in fact, I will be working 14 days in a row. Getting off at 11pm, means I won’t be pulling into my driveway until midnight. By the time I get home, the last thing I want to do is cook a full meal, especially something healthy. Basically, I have become lazy. I’m awake from 11am-4am every day, and I usual survive on anywhere between 3 to 7 hours a day if I am able to fall asleep at all.
To make matters worse, I am an insomniac and an anxiety ridden person. I suffer from Generalized Anxiety disorder and Panic Attacks. Recently, I went through 5 months of debilitating attacks that left me severely depressed. I started reading articles on how I could better my life and every single article recommended I start eating better, organizing my life, changing my attitude, and thinking positively. So here I am, ready to be in charge of my life, finally.
I work at a Historic Inn located in a state park. I spend my days getting yelled at by people for things I can’t control. I’ve had people throw things at me, curse me out, violently touch me, and scream at me for the most ridiculous things. I am somehow able to remain calm while I am being yelled at for things like: the bed is too firm, no one told me the hotel was in the woods (it’s a state park…), the pizza delivery guy took 2 hours to get here, the park isn’t well-lit, the rooms are too expensive, and the fact that I am too nice. That last one is a real kicker, isn’t it?! I’ve gone through gas leaks, fires, fist fights, obnoxiously drunk guests, and so much more. Yet, somehow, despite the fact that bend over backwards for my company, they have not once thanked me. There was no thank you when I came in over 40 times on my days off because someone called in sick. There was no thank you when I spent 16 hours cleaning every office in the building. No thank you when I bought paper and pens with my own money because the company refused to. And no thank you for all the times I came in early, stayed late, worked 14 days in a row, took care of my manager’s to-do list because ‘she just didn’t want to do it’. Needless to say, I hate the company I work for, I hate half of the guests that stay at the hotel…BUT, I love my job. I love the people who thank me for making their vacation amazing, I love the guests that buy me flowers for going above and beyond for them, I love the guests that only book rooms while I am working because they hate the rest of the staff, and I love the vast variety of people that I come across while working.
Things are stressful, to say the least. So it is time to put things back together, be happier, and live simply.